Ba-Lance…

Had a very interesting real-eye-zation and thought I’d share it and it’s journey, in case it calls/resonates with some of you, which I guess it might…
For the last three years, I started actively noticing that the past really had no hold on me anymore.
I had it’s essence, distilled though some really HARD practice, an inner alchemy almost. But that was about it.
There was a time when I could call up minute details of happy things/times, cars, motorcycles, sexual encounters, sporting highs…and relive those associated emotions in excruciating detail…..no more.
Not that it has blurred, it just does not incite emotion anymore.
And I started seeing that I had a similar view of the future. Being somewhat of an out of synch thinker, I kept trying, for many years, much to my detriment, to pull a future forward that was not ready to come.
I burnt a lot of core energy, being a sort of Don Quixote…. no more…
Result, is being much more present, always. Fully engaged. Little to no projection, expectation/judgement.
Most of the time of course 🙂 Jaipur traffic will draw the curse out of the mouth of a mauna rishi, what to speak of an ordinary mortal 😂
Balance. Nowhere, NOW-HERE.
More and more, I’ve been going nowhere, fast 🙂
Being that this IS a fractal world, dropping mental drops physical dross. And the other way around as well.
The mind is an elusive thing.
But the body is very much in our control.
How does one tame the emotions? We have adrenal burnout on all the wrong triggers, and cannot tell anymore when our actual lives are in danger through daily consuming poison in one form or another, fried, spiced, sliced and diced, of food.
Our movies and roller coasters and degraded audio environment has made the panic/adrenal switch wear out. Wolf!
But we can begin to work on it immediately. Like right now. e all know what the no’s are. And we know the yes’s too.
Why all the above. To really be at center, ON the locus of your focus, in the here and now you have to be upright, clear, resonant….and the chioces of what we put into our ears/eyes/mouth, rub on our skin, share sexual energy with (biggie)…..directly imapct that required clarity, balance etc.
As I learned, or was rather made to learn, the only way up the mountain is the way up the mountain. The journey of a thousand steps. Chop wood, carry water. Die to the world. Die to yourself.
No magic pill, no potion, no shaktipaath….
I am all I really know, if I know anyone/thing at all.
SAW-i-SEE